Fear of Having Missed Out

You’ve probably heard the term FOMO before, but if not, FOMO is an acronym for Fear of Missing Out. I think it is best described as a form of anxiety where, rather than worrying about experiencing bad things, you worry about not experiencing good things. It can be anything. Missing an email that will lead to a career opportunity, not getting invited to an event, staying subscribed to an email newsletter just in case there’s something useful in the future, like a good deal or insight (I’m guilty of doing this).

While some may experience negative effects from FOMO more than others, I think all of us, to a degree, have experienced and likely regularly experience FOMO.

What I want to talk about is what I’m going to call the Fear of Having Missed Out. It doesn’t make a pronounceable acronym, though, so for readability’s sake, I’ll spare you by not calling it FHMO.

I’ve seen this idea called golden age fallacy, where thoughts like “It was easier back in the day,” “If only I’d been around then,” or “It is too late to start now” criple one’s prospects, resulting in inaction.

Rather than fearing that you’re not getting to do something today, Fear of Having Missed Out manifests as fearing that it is too late, the ship sailed, and that the age of success is behind you.

I’ve experienced this before. I see someone’s successful career, and I think, “Wow, they lived through the golden age,” “It must have been awesome to be early in that company,” or “I wish there were opportunities like that today.” This is an easy trap to fall into. It isn’t as simple as jealousy. That’s not the right word here because of its negative association. You can admire the opportunities and success of others without being jealous of their success, after all, they earned it, but you can be jealous of the time and experiences that led to their success.

In a sense, there’s some truth to it. Maybe the ship has sailed, you are too late, and the age of success is behind you, but that’s not the case for every problem, opportunity, and successful idea. Yesterday was yesterday, but today is today, and tomorrow is tomorrow.

I don’t know what it is, where it is, or who it will be, but there’s something awesome happening right now. There’s something that if you start doing today, someone in a decade or two will wish they could have started when you did.

It is easy to look back at successful things and think, “I could have done that” and/or “That must have been fun” because you probably could have and it probably was, but while you spend time looking back, you’re missing out on what’s happening.

FOMO is a good thing.

If you take away one thing, remember this: It isn’t a coincidence that you feel like you could have started or been a part of many of today’s “cool” companies and projects. The truth is that lots of people probably could have done it. Most things aren’t that hard. The reason they were successful wasn’t because they were truly exceptional people (we give ourselves too much credit), but instead because they started and kept going.

The more time you waste wishing you could go back in time, the more opportunities you’re missing out on. Right now, you’re missing out, and the only person who can change that is you.

Fear missing out.